Eileen Coen Mediation
The road you take makes all the difference.

These blog articles address navigating separation and divorce and finding ways to make it work. I hope you’ll find them useful and invite your comments and questions.

New Year's Resolutions for a Good Divorce and a Good Life by Eileen Coen

New Year’s Resolutions for a Good Divorce and a Good Life

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

If you’re going through a divorce, the holiday season can be dreadful. It’s hard to celebrate when it feels like the world you once knew has tilted or spun out of control. There’s no question that your life is about to change in a big way. But there is a new year on the… Read More »

Why Thanksgiving Matters (and It's Not About the Turkey) By Eileen Coen

Why Thanksgiving Matters (and It’s Not About the Turkey)

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

Today I want to share a special gift. Actually, some might call it “re-gifting” but I call it “paying it forward.” Here is The Thanksgiving Reader, written by Seth Godin and freely distributed to thousands, maybe millions of people. Seth is one of my favorite bloggers, a best-selling author, and a prolific writer about… Read More »

thermometer

Is Divorce Stress Making You Sick?

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

If you’re in the midst of a separation or divorce, you’re probably no stranger to stress — but did you know that the higher conflict your divorce is, the more it puts your health at risk?  This Psychology Today article is not new — but it offers a useful tool for recognizing hidden stress… Read More »

fair divorce

What Is a Fair Divorce Financial Settlement? Child Support & Alimony Come Down to Dollars and Sense

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

When it comes to alimony and child support, most divorcing couples are concerned that their agreement is fair. However, in my experience as a divorce mediator, both parties are most successful when they focus on the dollars first, rather than the sense. In other words, focus on what’s possible as a prelude to discussing… Read More »

can divorcing parents share the nest

Can Divorcing Parents Share the Nest?

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

Creative parenting arrangements can take many forms, one of which is nesting. In a nesting arrangement, the children are the ones who “keep the house” while the parents take turns living there. For many families, nesting allows for the least possible disruption at a time when so much is changing in their lives.  But… Read More »

paying for college 3 things divorcing parents should do

Paying for College: 3 Things Divorcing Parents Should Do

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

Your child has met the college application deadline and the acceptances are rolling in… but for divorcing parents there’s another worry: How are college expenses to be paid and by whom? States do not impose an obligation on parents to pay for their children’s college expenses and these costs are not normally included in… Read More »

The secret to making your next marriage last

The Secret to Making your Next Marriage Last

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

As a family mediator, I specialize in divorce.  That doesn’t make me an expert on marriage, but I’ve gained some valuable insights over the years. Paradoxical though it seems, I believe that one key to achieving a good divorce is also the secret to a happy marriage.  Couples that succeed in “conscious uncoupling” tend… Read More »

5 Reasons to wait to date

Dating Before the Divorce Decree: Why it Pays to Wait

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

In a previous post, I offered tips for dating while separated. That article provides guidance to couples who agree that dating while separated is okay. But what rules apply when only one spouse thinks it’s okay to date before the divorce is final? Dating before the divorce is final Let’s consider the case of John… Read More »

four strategies for mediating a high conflict divorce

Four Strategies for Mediating a High Conflict Divorce

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

Mediating a high conflict divorce. Sometimes people assume that the only way to handle their divorce with a high conflict partner is to “lawyer up” and “buckle down” for the roller coaster ride. Statistically, this approach leads to increased conflict and less satisfaction with the results. There are also enormous financial and emotional costs,… Read More »

the quick and dirty on dating while separated

The “Quick & Dirty” on Dating While Separated

By Eileen Coen, J.D.

If you and your spouse are separated and you’re feeling anxious to meet someone new… this Valentine’s Day might have you wondering whether, and when, it’s okay to date. Having a conversation about dating is difficult but important to do before either spouse ventures out on dates. Back by popular demand, I’m re-posting a… Read More »

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